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The Adventures of Indy Andy

Tuesday, October 28, 2003

Child's Play 

Pong. Donkey Kong. Space Invaders. For me, just to hear those names puts a huge grin on my face, and I go misty eyed with nostalgia. They are, in my opinion some of the best computer games ever written. But how do they really compare to todays Playstation generation? Are they really as good as I remember?
Electronic Gaming Monthly magazine decided to put it to the test. They got nine kids, aged 10 to 13, to play seven of the most popular 'old skool' video games, and give their reactions. This is what they thought of Space Invaders:-

EGM: This game was so popular in Japan that...
John: They made it into a TV show?
EGM: Well, no. It was so popular that they ran out...
John: Oh, did they make collectible trading cards for it?
EGM: Um, no. It was so popular that there was a shortage of the coins used to play it.
John: But you can get this game on a cell phone. Why would you want to pay for it in an arcade?
Andrew: I've seen a game like this in the arcade, but it's tons faster.
Sheldon: ...and it's in color.
Andrew: ...and your spaceship looks more like a spaceship.
Nico: ...and not like a little box.
Gordon: It looks like food.
Andrew: Where's my rapid fire?
Nico: The aliens look like spiders...
Becky: ...and squids and crabs.
John: Maybe this is what seafood will do in a thousand years.
EGM: How long could you play this game before you got bored?
Sheldon: About 15 minutes.
Andrew: If you take it on the road and play it on your cell phone, then you might play it pretty long.
Nico: There's nothing else to do.
Andrew: Except look at nature.
EGM: Would you rather play this or play outside?
Andrew: Outside.
Nico: this game needs a super bomb or something.
Tim: This is nothing compared to Grand Theft Auto III, because you can't steal a taxi cab, pick up somebody, then drive into the ocean with him.
Kirk: And you can't pick up an AK-47 and go kill... Hey, those aliens on the top row, you use them in EGM for stuff.
EGM: Yeah, we use them to end our articles. They do kinda look like they're from Space Invaders, don't they?
Tim: They're going to sue you.
Kirk: I'm sure everyone who made this game is dead by now.

Friday, October 24, 2003

Vvrrrooooommm! 

Oh dear, I think I need a change of underwear! I've just read some exciting news about the latest instalment of one of the best games ever, Gran Turismo.
I read a report last week talking about a rumour that in the new game you might be able to get motorbikes as bonus vehicles.
This rumour came about because while the development team were at a track day recording the engine sounds, there were a wide variety of bikes there, and the sound crew seemed just as interested in them as in the cars.
It's now been announced that the bikes won't actually be in the game at all. Instead, Polyphony Digital will release a whole new game called Gran Turismo Bikes. The game will feature most of the tracks used by the cars (there'll be over 100!), as well as a few exclusive ones. Amongst the bikes you race will be models from Yamaha, Honda, Kawasaki, and even Harley Davidson.
The best thing about the whole idea? Because both games will use the same basic game engine, you'll be able to race one against the other using the Playstation Network Adaptor. Imagine that, a Dodge Viper going head to head with a Yamaha R1!

Right, I'm off for a cold shower....

Thursday, October 16, 2003

Japanese Madness 

Everyone knows that Japanese TV has got by far the wierdest shows in the world, especially their game shows. Remember Endurance? People performing acts of physical endurance, most of them extremely painful, for no apparent reason.
Well, I've recently discovered a new show from the Land of the Rising Sun that's just complete and utter bonkers! It's called Takeshi's Castle, and the best way of describing it would be to say that it's like It's a Knock Out (ask your parents), but done in a way that only the Japanese can do. The idea of the game is that the host, General Hayati Tani (usually called General Lee on British TV), is trying to recruit people to capture a castle from Count Takeshi. He has 100 volunteers to choose from, so he sets them a number of challenges, and anyone who fails a challenge is knocked out, until there are only five or six left to go through to the final showdown.
The games themselves are fast and furious, and usual involve the likelihood of suffering a serious injury, or falling headfirst into a lake of mud, or both. My three favourites are:-

Skipping Stones - here each volunteer basically has to run to the other side of the water using the stones to get across. Some of the stones move and some don't. Get across and you're through. The problem is, you have to run accross as fast as possible, and if you land on a moving stone your momentum carries you face first into the next, non moving, stone. I've seen a few bloodied noses, and I'm sure they've a dentist waiting in the wings to fix all the broken teeth.

Indestructable - In this game, each volunteer goes inside a big plastic ball that's a bit like a hamster ball. The ball is then rolled down a massive pinball table. When the ball gets to the bottom, there are 4 alcoves with skull faces on them. Avoid these and go in the gaps between the alcoves to go through to the next round. The ball is only about three feet in diameter, so you've got to be a contortionist to even climb into it in the first place! By the time they climb out they're battered, bruised, and so dizzy they can barely stand up.

Show Of Hands - 10 volunteers at a time are dressed up in giant hand suits. There are also loads of tiles on the ground with different numbers on each of them. A sum is then read out to them and the first one to jump hands down onto the correct tile advances to the next round. A pretty safe game to play, but totally hilarious to watch.

At the end of each show, the final few contestant get the chance to storm Takeshi's Castle, which basically involves driving around a car park in a big dodgem like thing trying to fire a water pistol at a paper target on the kart driven by the Emerald Guard, who are the baddies. If the paper target on your kart gets penetrated then you're out of the game, but if get Count Takeshi's target, you've successfully stormed the castle, and you win the grand prize of a million Yen (about £5,500). I've only seen this happen once, though.
Takeshi's Castle is shown most weekdays at 18:30 on Challenge TV, with one hour specials at 22:00 three nights a week.

Mini Pops 

Think you know a lot about pop culture? Do you knows who's who? If you do, put your knowledge to the test.
This Minipops Quiz will sort out those in the know from those without a clue.
If you get stuck, or want the answers you can cheat by visiting this site and trawling through the A-Z, or if you ask me nicely I might even email them to you. In case you're wondering, I got 63 out of 95 on my first try.

Friday, October 10, 2003

Mmm, Beer 

We all love a good drink. For some people, going out on a Friday or Saturday night and getting completely rat-arsed is the highlight of their week. For others (not mentioning any names Jay!), it's their sole reason for being.
But have you ever sat down and wondered just how much you've drunk? How much money has disappeared down your throat, and if you'd saved it, how many Ferraris could you have bought? If you really want to know the answers to these questions then follow this link
For the record, I haven't drunk as much as I thought I had (or as much as I'd like!), and I'd still only be able to afford one wheel on that Ferrari.

Art, or just plain wierd? 

Want to see something freaky? Enjoy being scared? I'm not talking blood and guts shock horror, or even sudden shock, made you jump out of your seat horror. I'm talking real psychological, heeby jeeby, shivers down the spine PROPER horror.
If that's your thing, and you're feeling brave, then check this out.
This site is not for the faint hearted. It's one of the spookiest things I've seen in ages, and it's not often I get spooked (unless there's clowns involved...).

Thursday, October 09, 2003

Support act announced 

I've just found out who's going to be supporting Metallica at Earls Court in December, and I've got to say I'm pretty happy. The band is calledGodsmack. Unless you're really into rock music you may not have heard of them as they're not particularly big over here, but they've got a huge following in America.
I first heard them on a local rock station when I was on holiday in Florida back in 2000, but they've also got a track on the Mission Impossible 2 soundtrack, and have released three studio albums and a live DVD.
Musically, their songs rock hard, but without being too heavy. At the core of all their songs is a killer riff, and all the rest, vocals, solos, etc. stem from that riff. I haven't seen them live before, but if they can play live as well as they can in a studio then they should be the perfect warm up for Metallica

Tuesday, October 07, 2003

Caulrophobia 

[Evil Personified]

Is it really just me? Surely someone else out there must suffer from this affliction. In case you don't know what it means (I've only just found out this is the official term myself), caulrophobia is an intense fear of clowns.
Most people think I'm mad when I tell them how much I hate clowns, and I can't really describe it fully myself. It's got something to do with their mouths. There are generally two styles of make up for a clown's mouth, either smiling or really sad.
The way I see them though is the smiling ones are laughing maniacally, taking great pleasure in whatever evil they are about to perform, and the others look like they are suffering eternal torment and damnation.
It wasn't always like that, I used to love clowns. I think the thing that changed it for me was when my parents took me to a holiday camp when I was about 7 or 8, and a clown dragged me up on stage to tell a joke, but I couldn't think of any and stood there in front of a whole room full of people and cried!
Just writing this post has sent goosebumps up my spine!

Behold my Wrath!! 

I don't get angry often, but when I do people tremble in fear and bow before me. Here's why:-

What Is Your Battle Cry?

Lo! Who is that, rampaging across the cliffs! It is Indy Andy, hands clutching a studded crowbar! He screams mightily:

"Vengeance and goo flow from my veins! Man, that's some good coffee!"

Find out!
Enter username:
Are you a girl, or a guy ?

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See, now that's why I prefer tea!

Monday, October 06, 2003

Oops! 

Sorry. As you may have noticed, I messed up the links in my last few posts. These have all been corrected now, and I've listed them all again below. Enjoy!

Half Life 2 videos

Eddie Izzard

Tom Baker

Bouncing Bear

Saturday, October 04, 2003

He should be in a Circus 

I hate the circus. It's full of silly people riding horses backwards and stuff, not to mention those horrible clowns (they really are the scariest things in the world!). But maybe if Gerry Cottle or the Russian State Circus put more of this kind of thing in, I might be more willing to go. I was laughing for a full five minute after seeing it!

Doctor.... Who? 

It's official, they've finally announced who will be the next Doctor Who. It's going to be Eddie Izzard. I first heard the rumour a couple of months ago, and this week all the rumours have been confirmed. I think Eddie is going to be perfect in the role, as he's the type of quirky, eccentric, and typically British character that the Doctor was always supposed to be. Besides, anybody would play the part better than Paul McGann did, not to mention the intriguing prospect of seeing The Doctor roaming the Galaxy in a dress!

Talking of Eddie Izzard, he's recently done a promotional video for Greenpeace which I found rather amusing, and it has given him an early chance to practice acting alongside dodgy looking aliens.

And still on the subject of Doctor Who, I found this audio clip of my favourite Doctor (and of everbody else in their 20's and 30's), Tom Baker. I wonder what the Daleks and Cyber Men would have made of it?

Bigger, Harder, Faster 

Another week gone by without any new posts. But there's a good reason for it this time - I've got myself a new computer!
No longer will I have to suffer with a crappy 450MHz processor, waiting for an eternity for applications to open, and having to check whether a game would run on my machine before buying it.
Now I can relax in the knowledge that my new 2.5GHz processor and other high end bobbins will easily deal with whatever I care to throw at it, including the sublime Half Life 2. Don't get me wrong, I didn't buy the computer just so I could play it (honest, guv!), but if you watch these movies, you'll see why I'm more excited than a five year old kid on Christmas morning!

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